OnTheLine blog

Note to Andy Roddick

Dude, that thing you said after losing the Wimbledon final was pure class.

Note to Wimbledon

Dudes! You so need lights on all courts more than you needed a roof.

Note to Maria Sharapova

It's not that we do not like you. We do not like the screaming. Also, perhaps the preening. And the slowness. But you're okay!
Now, please go and have a think about the extra great reserves of energy you would have if you did not produce all that sound. You would be tremendous!

Note to the BBC

Less talk, more tennis!
And why is it that Elena Baltacha cannot get any respect? Is it that she is Scottish (by way of Ukraine)? No, wait ...

Another note to Tracy Austin

Silence is golden. Go with it!
Thank you.

Note to Tracy Austin

The word "error" in fact contains two syllables.
Thank you.

The ATP is getting hit...right in the money-maker

Something is wrong with the ATP tour of late. It's actually becoming...competitive?

At one time, finals matches were a place reserved for Rafa and Roger. It did not particularly matter who won, for Rafa got his kicks on clay (and then grass), and Roger was pretty content with a mere two Slams a year in Australia and the U.S.

But all of a sudden, these tennis peons have developed the audacity to rise up and defeat King Nadal and Duke Federer.

How am I supposed to watch Roger do titillating tennis tricks in Schick razor commercials when I know that he's close to being number three or (God forbid) number four in the world?

Tearfully.

Tennis is fast-becoming a sport of not the few, but the many. Jo-Wilfried Tsonga has already picked up 19 wins in this young season (including two titles), and is quickly becoming the man to watch in men's tennis. The burly Frenchman not only breaks the scrawny tennis player stereotype, his appearance and Ali-likeness seems to transcend the sport. He's not your mother's tennis player.

Players like Juan Martin Del Potro, Andy Murray, and Gael Monfils are a new generation in men's tennis, and all of a sudden, the tournament has become more than a Federer-Nadal bout.

And Novak is no hack either. Djokovic, the sensational Serb, has developed an overall game that can beat both Federer and Nadal regularly. And that's not very nice.

Neither are the economic implications. Roger and Rafa brought in millions of dollars, and viewers with nothing more than a passing interest in tennis and biceps. But with a field that is quickly leveling, we have to wonder if the ATP will feel the financial crunch without two consistent money-makers.

The press they received for the latest Wimbledon was astronomical, and the match itself was exponentially more exciting than advertised.

But remember Tsonga's particularly disinteresting loss to Djokovic in the Aussie Open last year? I don't. How is the ATP supposed to survive with finals that leave much to be desired?

I certainly appreciate their talents. I'm not so certain the ATP execs will quite as much. Because how Roger and Rafa go will indicate the popularity of tennis. Bottom line.

Best of luck, men of professional tennis. Also, be sure to get some extra sponsors.

The English ...

are trying to play India in a cricket test match. Outdoors. In England. Much rain has ensued.
They will never learn.

Congratulations

... to Kim Clijsters. Cannot be angry about that news!

Note to the English weather

We really, really, really hate you.

Also, we've decided our new favourite tournament is the Australian Open. Because they have two roofs. And pretty good play, too.